Cleaning Up!

No, I’m not talking about making a sweep at the casino (although a run at the BlackJack table would be nice), I’m talking about –  The Mansion.

Ever since the housekeeper took off, the mansion just hasn’t looked the same. I’ve tried. I really have. I’ve tried SO HARD that I actually have FIVE (yes, I counted them – 1, 2, 3, 4, 5) vacuum cleaners (although I gave one to my brother last week, because his finally died). WHY would ANYONE need FIVE vacs?

Because – the mansion is 80% white tile floors and 20% off white carpet (well, it WAS off-white when I moved in). I keep buying vacuum cleaners in the hopes that ONE SINGLE MACHINE can handle both the tile (without shooting the debris and putting a massive dent in my shin), the (*cough*) white carpet…oh, and the yellow sofa, that the dog has claimed as his giant bed.

Don’t get me wrong, I have a combination of 2 or 3 that would do the trick, but I could never find ONE that could REALLY do it all and DO IT WELL.

The Heaven’s Open and the Light Shines Through….. Good Lord, I’m over-dramatic.


Sears asked me if I’d like to review a vacuum cleaner. After I  finished laughing uncontrollably, I responded  with a nice note, letting them know that I have a difficult time with the pelting of my shins during the vacuuming process. What I should have written was…

“Dear Sears,


I’m thinking that it might not be such a great marketing idea for you to ask me to review your vacuum. I have vacuuming issues that can’t be resolved with years of therapy, so I don’t think a Kenmore Progressive 21614 Canister Vacuum would do the trick. Do you happen to have a 4-deck card shuffler or maybe a 4 karat diamond necklace that I could review?


Sincerely,
Zippy”

Apparently, the Sears Company thinks I’m kidding. They sent me the vacuum.

At first appearance, it was a nice enough looking vacuum (as far as canister vacs go). The canister is a lovely plum color (although it comes in also comes in white), at least what I could see of it from the box. Vacuums usually mean “some assembly required” – which translates to – “it will sit in the box for the next month until I can get some sucker…I mean Mr. S., to put it together.” After a week, I decided I’d take it out of the box. I could always stick it back in (sort of). To my surprise, it was pretty much all set, except for a couple of places that had to be snapped together (the parts that you’d normally take apart and put together when you switch the tools).

Well, that part was easy.

I figured I’d give it a test spin. I tried it on the tile floor, the bedroom carpet, the throw rugs and the dog bed (I mean sofa).


Here’s what I like.

1. It uses these heavy duty HEPA bags. I know, most of you like the vacuums that don’t have bags…BUT…if you have ALLERGIES (because emptying bag-less vacs means dust in the air), or have had a “miss” (when the dirt ends up in a pile on the floor instead of in the trash) you’ll come to really appreciate the HEPA cloth bags. I admit to both. I used to think that I was just allergic to cleaning…I found out it was the dust. Personally, I like the 1st scenario better.


2. You don’t have to do anything other than flip a switch on the handle to change from cleaning bare floors to carpet. It’s supposed to be great on stairs too – but I don’t have any so…

3. What canister vacuums have over uprights is…that they can get UNDER FURNITURE without having to break your back moving stuff. OK, so I’m lazy.I’d rather vacuum around something and ignore underneath. Now I can get UNDER the TV stand, sofa and beds (if I want to).


4. IT SUCKS! In a good way – isn’t that what vacuums do? If I were to tell Mr. S. he sucks, it wouldn’t be a good thing, but my Kenmore Progressive 21614 Canister Vacuum  sucking, means CLEAN (guess it’s that powerful 2 motor system).

5. I don’t have to lift a finger to switch from bare floor to carpet…because the switch is right where my hand sits on the wand. I can also easily change the the cleaning tools right from where my hand sits, making it easy to use for dusting the furniture and window sills.

6.. The special 6 in-1 handle attaches any of the following: 1 ) Combination brush 2) Pet Powermate 3) Crevice tool 4) Pet hair tool 5) Floor brush,, 6) wand and power.

7. The dog has his own vacuum. YES, there is a POWERFUL pet hair tool, although Clem didn’t seem to like it when I attempted to vacuum him. It did however work well on the sofa.

So far I haven’t found anything wrong with it, except it  means I now have SIX vacuums (wait, 5 – unless my brother gives me that one back). I’ll keep you posted about the   Kenmore Progressive 21614 Canister Vacuum  as I use it over the holiday season.

“Dear Sears,


I tried your Kenmore Progressive 21614 Canister Vacuum  and I walked away without any major damage to my shins, and some clean floors. I’m still available to review that diamond necklace I mentioned in my earlier e-mail. Feel free to throw in some matching earrings if you see fit.


Sincerely,
Zippy


P.S. Does this mean I can cancel next week’s therapy session?”


I received a vacuum from Sears for this review. I was in no way compensated and all opinions are strictly my own.