Another day another shopping mall.

While I spend yet another day flying, I realize that I’ve left the latest Carl Hiaasen book behind and have little more to amuse me than the Sky Mall catalog and my Butterball U. itinerary. Now, as you know I travel quite a bit (and it seems to be happening more and more often), so I’ve come to accept Sky Mall as a trusted purveyor of fine merchandise. Seriously, a romp through these 231 pages would keep any blogger in posts for at least a year.

If you’re not all that familiar with Sky Mall, it is an airline catalog that is made up of a few pages from various mail order catalogs of generally either high end or hard to find merchandise (hard to find, meaning – stuff that no one really wants or needs at prices that are outrageous).

I vaguely remember the old Spy Catalogs of years ago, and was frankly surprised by this addition to the Holiday 2010 edition. Ah yes, what every red blooded husband or wife needs can now be purchased discreetly from page 116E.

Imagine rummaging through your wife’s handbag or your DH’s sportcoat pocket to find his cell phone once he’s dozed off into la-la-land and be able to actually read his deleted messages. The “Cell Phone Spy” (which claims to be “#1 tool used by private investigators & law enforcement”) will enable you to “view the text messages they don’t want you to see.”

I chuckled a bit as I read the message blazed across the picture of the mobile phone in the ad….


“Hurry she just left….COME OVER :-)”

I think it’s the smiley face that really captured the essence of the message. I mean, what says “I’m having an affair” more than a computer-speak smiley face?

Of course if you need to read smart cards, or have a deeper forensic analysis, you can always upgrade to the “Cell Phone Spy ELITE.” I don’t know about you, but if I was worried about Mr. S’s after hours escapades, I’d certainly want to spend the $198.95 on the upgraded edition.

With this sense of security tucked deep in my Louis Vuitton, I now can have the piece of mind that I need.

And you thought that all I was going to do this week was cook turkey and hang with the Turkey-Talk folks.

I’m sure that many (or most) of you have been in my seat, stuck in the window seat with little more than the Sky Mall catalog and a small plastic glass of Coca-Cola (they didn’t even offer peanuts). Since I seem to be up in the air, more than I’m in my car lately – what are your suggestions for passing the time when the person sitting next to you doesn’t want to chat?